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The practice of restorative justice (RJ) in education has been growing. RJ can be understood in dramatically different ways: as an approach that challenges systems of discipline and control in schools; or as another tool emphasizing compliance and punishment. This multi-site case study examined the application and intended objectives of RJ in schools in Scotland and Canada. Using questionnaires, observations, learning circles and engaging students as co-researchers, I focused on the student experience. The study finds that RJ in schools is a window into what is most fundamental to students: relationships. The study argues that RJ does not guarantee certain qualities of relationship, but it allows us to ask questions of how school relationships are used to engage and/or control.