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In this autoethnographic paper, I share my academic journey as an Asian faculty member in a predominantly white institution and school of education. As a scholar in disAbility Studies in Education (DSE), I have contextualized disAbility within political and social spheres in my pedagogical and scholarly endeavors. Although I have been advocating for “social justice, equitable and inclusive educational opportunities, and full and meaningful access to all aspects of society for people labeled with disability” (Connor, Gabel, Gallagher, and Morton, 2008, p. 448), dismissing the notion that anyone who does not fit the demands of normalcy is deviant and dangerous (Davis, 1995), it did not dawn on me until I reflected on my identity as a person of color that I have been the epitome of being deviant and dangerous, and that my “colored identity” did not fit the demands of normalcy in a predominantly White school of education. This epiphany made me juxtapose my identity onto disability.
As disAbility is social constructed, so is race as society’s response to ‘differences’ from the norm (Mirza, 1998). Bogdan and Biklen posit that ‘handicapism,’ defined as “a set of assumptions and practices that promote the differential and unequal treatment of people because of … physical, mental, or behavioral differences” (1977, p. 14) has many parallels to racism (2013). My differences, among “non-colored” faculty, indeed promoted unequal and differential treatment by White faculty, described briefly in the following incident.
In May, 2012, two White senior colleagues approached me about a manuscript that I had been working on. One said that the other should be listed as a co-author since she gave me the idea about the manuscript. He also demanded that he read my manuscript before I submit it to a publisher. After having been harassed by him since 2008, I finally filed a grievance against him, my program director, in August, 2012. Although I was presumably teaching at the institution, fully committed to maintaining a multicultural academic community in which the dignity and worth of each of its members are respected, I had been continuously harassed and emotionally tormented by White faculty. In this predominantly White institution, my voice did not matter, nor was my dignity restored after the formal grievance as nothing happened or changed.
This incident underscores how differences are perceived in our society whether it is race or disability and that both continue to be a dominant social construct. Unless these constructs are deliberately examined in social and cultural context, stereotypes and discrimination will persist, promoting the concept that average is ideal (Davis, 2006). I hope that this paper will empower us to challenge the status quo and promote social justice in higher education and society. Only when all join to challenge the status quo do we create a more just society for all.