"Y'all Can Have It": A Black Woman's Experience Navigating Through Academic Institutions

• In Event: Black Collectivity and Institutional Dynamics: Perspectives on Resistance, Representation, and Navigation of Doctoral Training

Abstract

As a Black woman who has attended three PWIs, my lived experiences have consistently contradicted the mission statements and diversity positions they put forth. These inconsistencies result in spaces that are not safe, secure, or equitable in service of Black students. The natural response of some Black students is to advocate and resist the structures that have been established within these institutions. The tensions and hardships of those who have attempted and were exhausted from their efforts prompted internal reflection. This reflection caused me to question, “is this my responsibility to repair?” Consequently, I adopted the position of a consumer – matriculating through these systems with the goal of obtaining my degree without any vested interest in resisting or confronting the systems’ inconsistencies.

Purpose
The purpose of this paper is to examine the impact of living as a Black woman doctoral student within the contradictory spaces of PWI’s, which purport mission statements that they never intend to effectuate and implement. Using the tenet of counter-storytelling in Critical Race Theory (CRT) as a model, I challenge the notion that PWIs have maintained fidelity to their intended mission and vision (Delgado & Stefancic, 2017).

Theoretical Framework
Liberatory feminist theory utilizes personal testimony and personal experience as a means for theory making (Hooks, 1991). Theorizing provides a pathway to comprehension of what is occurring in and around us. Writing, or theoretical talk, instigates critical reflection which creates space for reflection and analysis of lived experience (Hooks, 1991). I employ liberatory feminist theory as a lens to analyze and understand the tension of my experience considering PWIs mission statements and my rejection of the position of student advocate in higher education institutions.

Method of Inquiry
I utilize autoethnography as the research method for this study. Autoethnography allows for the sensemaking and analysis of my lived experience and gives legitimacy to the relevance of my story (Pathak, 2010). The mission statements and diversity statements of the three PWIs I attended along with my written reflections are critically examined. As a Black woman scholar, elevating my voice both as the source of the data and as the researcher disrupts the normative pattern of white male voices as legitimate scholarship (Pathak, 2010).

Significance
There is a wide range of literature focusing on the role of student advocacy in higher education institutions. The implications of this work, including but not limited to the fatigue of Black students, have also been studied. The falseness purported by PWIs is felt and carried by students of color with little to no acknowledgment or accountability of the harmful practices inflicted by these institutions. There is sparse literature on exploring the ramifications of Black students who intentionally reject the pressure to engage in higher education activism. I would submit Black students’ refusal to lend their bodies and labor to these institutional struggles will preserve their energy for worthwhile struggles where their voices will be heard, respected, and likely will instigate change.

Author

• Candace Kyles, Loyola University Chicago
  Presenting Author