A Piano Mismatch: Passion, Dreams, and a Good Boy

• In Event: Reflexivity in Arts-Based Research Through Performative Autoethnography

Abstract

I (Presenter 2) investigate a common problem in piano (and other musical instruments) lessons—a mismatch of passion and expectations between teacher and student. Through a series of short, creative non-fictionally styled stories and reflections on music psychology concepts, this autoethnographic research (Ellis, Adams, & Bochner, 2011) explores my learning and playing experiences on piano through a bi-musical lens of classical piano on the one hand and improvisation and jazz/gospel/blues piano on the other. I orientate my piano learning journey with my teacher around notions of harmonious/obsessive passion (Bonneville-Roussy & Vallerand, 2020), creativity and mind wandering (Gonçalves et al., 2020), and learner autonomy and self-efficacy (Hendricks, 2015). The crux of the paper lies in the mismatch between my classical piano teacher’s musical passion and my own musical passion. My teacher’s passion was constructed through an enculturation of classical piano pedagogy and a dedication for service in music, while mine developed through a bi-musical process that strongly favoured autodidactic learning ‘by ear’ and autonomy through improvisation. While the passion of my teacher did sometimes gel with my tendencies and interests, inevitably there was a mismatch of intentions, direction, and expectations that led to some difficult moments of conflict and a loss of well-being. The chapter concludes by examining the possibilities of a piano teacher-student relationship that moves beyond these issues and finds a more positive direction for student autonomy in music learning.

Author

• David K. Lines, University of Auckland