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Abstract: The four authors set out to study teacher’s beliefs about success and struggle as it relates to racialized groups in mathematics. Initial coding of teacher interviews, however, revealed that finding something definitive to say about the results was not an easy endeavor because of the wide array of teacher responses as well as their attempts to avoid discussing race. This study uses an interpretive phenomenological analysis of the authors’ experiences, as documented in journal reflections, to better understand the phenomenon of conducting qualitative research about race in mathematics and to inform methodology for this type of research moving forward.