Waiting to exhale: Undoing Black linguistic trauma and healing of a neurodiverse Black woman

• In Event: Black Women Educators Storying Healing and Reclaiming the Work Their Soul Must Have

Abstract

This critical autoethnographic study examines the author's personal experiences with anti-Black linguistic racism (ABLR; Baker-Bell, 2020) and the process of healing from Black Linguistic Trauma (BLT) to Black linguistic healing (BLH) in order to reclaim the voice once silenced in academic spaces.
Utilizing Critical Race Theory (CRT; Crenshaw, 1989; Delgado & Stefancic, 2017) and intersectionality theory (IT; Crenshaw, 1989; 1991) as theoretical frameworks, the study explores the Black Linguistic Identity (BLI; Baker-Bell, 2020) and what the author conceptualizes as Black Linguistic Trauma/Violence (BLTV; what the author defines as psychological and emotional harm from repeated exposure to linguistically hostile climates that demean Black Language practices) and Black Linguistic Healing (BLH; what the author defines as a state of awareness of and actively resisting the societal Black linguistic pressures). Standard language ideologies become operationalized through policies, curriculum, and teacher practices to undermine Black Language speakers. To build the conceptualization, Black Linguistic Justice/ Anti-Racist Black Language Pedagogy (BLJ/ARBLP; Baker-Bell, 2020), Black Linguistic Identity (BLI; Baker-Bell, 2020), and DisCrit (Annema et al., 2013; Annema et al.; 2018). The researcher’s positionality at the intersection of identities, including being a Black, Black Language (BL) speaking womxn plays a role in the experiences and the analysis.
Critical autoethnography (Boylorn & Orbe, 2019; 2021) is employed as the primary methodology, using reflective writing, poetry, images, and conversations as data sources. Data collection includes reflective poems, visual artifacts, a culture-gram activity, and researcher memos. Systematic qualitative analysis is conducted on memories and narratives related to linguistic discrimination. Preliminary findings reveal themes of power, oppression, trauma, resistance, and intersectionality, illuminating the deep harms of raciolinguistic ideologies that position Black Language as inferior. Also, how curriculum, policies, standards, and teacher practices exert power over Black Language usage, pressuring conformity to white mainstream expectations in writing and speaking. This replicates oppressive societal forces that devalue Black Language as deficient. These preliminary findings also suggest how repeated exposure to raciolinguistic ideologies causes anxiety, somatic symptoms, and loss of self-confidence. However, the preliminary findings also reveal sources of resistance. Through creative rhetorical moves, the author found ways to assert linguistic identity and challenge norms judging Black Language as substandard. Building community with other minoritized language speakers provided valuable solidarity and affirmed cultural modes of expression leading to BLH.
This study contributes to understanding how BL-speaking womxn navigate power, oppression, and identity under conditions of linguistic racism. It highlights the need for antiracist language pedagogies and has implications for policy, practice, and future research. The author advocates for the widespread adoption of Antiracist Black Language Pedagogy (Baker-Bell, 2020) and the active resistance that leads to Black linguistic healing.
Black girls that become Black womxn are often silenced in different ways, therefore the susceptibility to the BLTV by adhering to social norms and expectation around self written and spoken expression. BLH is a journey to wellness and authenticity. Taking off respectability through active resistance to social norms policing Black Language and forced conformity to whiteness and Standard Language Ideology.

Author

• Amelia Quonyelle Rivera, North Carolina State University