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Based on qualitative data from focus groups and in-depth interviews with 58 in-service teachers and 18 classroom teachers across urban China (2024–2025), the study develops an analytical framework of feeling structure to map the emotional norms and power relations shaping teacher–parent relationships. The findings reveal that Chinese teachers must constantly navigate and reconcile conflicting feeling rules rooted in performative, professional, and political logics. Confronted with this complex system, teachers have individually developed defensive and distancing emotional strategies, becoming distrustful of parents and reluctant to build close connections. The emotional authenticity at the core of the teaching profession is thus under threat, while institutional support at the school level plays a direct and significant role in supporting teachers’ well-being and agency.