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Educational institutions' overemphasis on test scores (Hytten, 2022) and standardized ideas (Reeves, 2018) overshadow teachers’ complex realities. Using Britzman’s framework and Lacanian theory, this paper examines how two middle school teachers (re)negotiate their identities with “difficult knowledge.” Thematic analysis of interviews reveals (1) tensions between expectations and realities, (2) curricular conundrums, and (3) emotional negotiations in response to community norms and pressures. This study advocates for an onto-epistemic shift in teacher education, viewing teacher subjectivity as a space for ethical and pedagogical rethinking. Additionally, it highlights teacher subjectivity as a disruptive force that challenges dominant narratives around teaching and learning.