Teaching Through Grief: Reflections on Masculinity for Men of Color

• In Event: Grief as a Portal to the Past, Present, and Future: Narratives of Educators of Color

Abstract

Objective
In recent years, universities have implemented initiatives to recruit more men of color into higher education and the teaching profession in response to the ways that they are vanishing from the educational pipeline (Saenz & Ponjuan, 2009). Men of color educators are often positioned as relatable to boys of color, as being able to address disciplinary issues because of their authenticity, and of being able to serve as role models of successfully maneuvering the challenges of manhood (Brockenbrough, 2015; Martino & Frank, 2006; Singh, 2021). Yet, for many men of color educators, their teacher identity is filtered through external pressures to perform a culturally specific form of masculinity that restricts their access to emotions, values meritocratic individualism, and reinforces heteropatriarchy. This paper attempts to center grief as a portal to access a fuller understanding of masculinity that can shape the pedagogical practices for men of color and the role they play in schools.

Theoretical Framework
In his understanding of critical pedagogy, Freire (1970) insists that dialogue, reflection, and praxis are necessary for the development of educators. This framing of pedagogy needs to be in direct relation with sociocultural, political, and economic changes. In this paper, I couple Weller’s (2015) invitation to dialogue with grief and emotions and see them as theories that provide us information and open possibilities to new ways of being and knowing that help us reflect on our self, our pedagogical practices, and the roles we play in educational spaces.

Methods & Findings
This autoethnography (Chang, 2013) centers my experiences with grief as a Latino man and as an educator in a Chicana/o Studies department. I draw on my personal and analytic reflections after the sudden and tragic loss of my father that I collected via journal entries, reflective memos, and other artifacts over the last three years. This process uncovered (1) a deepened sense of cultural identity as I shared in collective grief practices, (2) finding a more relational approach to teaching by humanizing my emotions with students, and (3) a commitment to encouraging other men of color educators to be reflective of their pedagogical practices.

Significance
This study expands the work on masculinities and the call for more men of color educators by theorizing how grief enabled me to make space for critical reflection. The heteropatriarchal logics that have shaped the experiences of men of color educators have created systems to discipline feelings and behaviors that are unwelcome such as loss and uncertainty. What might it look like to welcome systems that center joy, futurity, and full humanity as well as fear, insecurity, and memories of hurt? What else might men of color be experiencing that they are not able to articulate because of a lack of emotional literacy? These reflections are a starting point to explore how to support the recruitment and retention of men of color educators and to address the pressing needs of educators of color as they experience the ongoing loss we are collectively experiencing and have historically felt.

Author

• JC Lugo, California State University - Northridge