"Mothering While Black": Birthing a Black Boy During COVID-19 and Heightened Police Brutality Protest

• In Event: "Control, Alt, Delete": Recalibrating Work-Life Harmony and Reaffirming Scholarly Identity to Better Cultivate Educational Equity

Abstract

At 2:00pm CST, I phoned my OBGYN and informed her that I was leaking fluid. She instructed, “leave your house before 4pm. If you do not leave, you will be stuck at home. Protests are beginning in the wake of George Floyd’s murder, and we will be unable to reach you. Also, if you test positive for COVID-19, we will have to transfer you to the COVID-19 wing, and after birth you will be unable to hold your son; he will have to leave with a designated guardian after he is medically cleared.”

After navigating side streets for 1.5 hours, we finally made it to the hospital. I tested negative for COVID-19 and was able to safely transfer to the birthing wing where I was greeted by my OBGYN who asked if I was okay. I responded, I’m terrified because research shows that from 2007-2016, Black mothers died at a rate of 3.2 times that of White mothers during the birthing process (Hoyert, Uddin, & Minino, 2020). She replied, “I remember you telling me this when you first heard your child’s heartbeat during your first visit. No worries; we have taken care of you along the way, and we will ensure we see this through.” Fulfilling her promise, on June 1, 2020, at 5:03am, weighing 8lbs 10oz, 21inches long, my first born, a baby boy, entered the world. I cried, prayed, and whispered to myself and my newborn child: We made it. Soon thereafter, I was overcome with anxiety realizing that after years of researching and working to cultivate educational equity within P-12 and higher education, my Black son was soon to encounter these very systems. Mothering while Black during COVID-19 and amid protest against police brutality towards Black men, is a profound reminder of how the intersection of race, socioeconomic status, and gender shapes the way our children are birthed, reared, and feared in American health, education, and justice systems.

In this autoethnography, I position my narrative at the intersection of race, socioeconomic status, and gender and the impact this trifecta has on navigating systemic inequities in health and education, and how these key tenants underscore how Black families racially socialize their children (Dow, 2016). My journal is the primary data source for this study. I analyze entries that document my experiences raising a Black boy in 21st century America, exploring the nuances and challenges of child rearing, including daycare, during COVID-19, and protesting against police brutality. Further, I share how turning to my scholars of color community –The Village—helped me prioritize self-care and navigate this new terrain as a Black mother experiencing firsthand the systemic inequities that I often research and problematize in my scholarship and profession.

This research contributes to the growing body of literature that centers counternarratives (Solorzano & Yosso, 2002) and experiences of Black middle-class women and mothers navigating American health and education systems that have historically disenfranchised them and their families and produced systemic inequities that warrant dismantling and transformative reconstruction.

Author

• Montrischa M. Williams, American Institutes for Research