I'm Not Like Other Men: Egalitarian Narratives as Identity Work Among College-Educated Men

• In Event: 233 - Regular Session. Masculinities 1

Abstract

According to dominant cultural representations, masculinity in heterosexual relationships is signified by men’s dominance, aggression, sexual promiscuity, and emotional unavailability. Yet, the preferred way of doing masculinity is context-specific, and middle-class men face increasing expectations that they engage in egalitarian relationships. In this study, I use in-depth interviews with 31 college-educated, heterosexual men to explore how they construct their masculinity under changing social conditions. My findings show that men use egalitarian narratives as a form of identity work in which they compose understandings of themselves as progressive, caring, and respectful of women, in contrast to the majority of men, whom they ascribe with stereotypical male traits. However, these egalitarian narratives serve as a shield, allowing men to dismiss inequalities that emerge in their romantic relationships as the result of individual preference so that gendered outcomes are allowed to go unquestioned, leaving gender inequalities intact.

Author

• Ellen Lamont, New York University