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Metaphors are absolutely essential to sociologists’ work. Following conceptual metaphor theory (CMT), all human action and cognition is shaped by conceptual metaphors, and this is especially true for the abstract concepts that are influenced by the metaphorical mapping of a non-sociological domain onto the sociological domain. Following poetic metaphor theory (PMT), science itself is irreducibly metaphorical—dependent upon maintaining the tension between empirical reality and the disciplinary apparatus of sociology. Combining CMT and PMT, we see that sociology is doubly metaphorical and also prone to a double-mythology that results when the metaphorical nature of our work is forgotten. This paper takes up Brown’s (1976) call to develop a “poetics of sociological knowledge” for the purpose of maintaining the vitality of sociological science. After developing a functionalist typology of metaphors in the discipline, the paper describes four possible outcomes of metaphor use in our disciplinary practices. It concludes by proposing a list of “rules of the poetic sociological method” that sociologists should follow to ensure that the metaphorical tension upon which our disciplinary activity depends is not lost.