"I Wouldn't Say We're Friends": Gendered Differences in Structural Interdependence after Marriage

• In Event: 40820 - Section on Sociology of Sex and Gender Roundtables
  In Refereed Roundtable (60 minute): Table 16: Fraught Intimacies and Leisure

Abstract

As a couple progresses in a romantic relationship, their social networks become increasingly intertwined, leading to more mutual friend and family relationships and fewer separate relationships. For both men and women, knowing their spouse’s friends is linked to higher marital satisfaction, and having their spouse know their friends in return has an even greater positive association. However, the transition to marriage also has different effects for men and women, and in mixed-gender marriages, men tend to derive more benefits from marriage than women. I conducted an interview study with recently married couples to study the process of increasing interdependence and how that process affected husbands and wives differently. I found that when couples engaged in joint activities with friends, they tended to be with the husbands' friends rather than the wives'. Since having one's spouse know one's friends is linked to larger benefits than knowing one's spouse's friends, it appears husbands may be reaping more of the benefits of interdependence than their wives. This difference in interdependence explains at least in part why men gain greater benefits from marriage than women: they are benefitting from interdependence to a larger degree, while women are paying more of the costs.

Author

• Madeleine Meldrum, Indiana University-Bloomington