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Research suggests more similarities than differences across gender in the individual level processes leading to violence. Yet, the gender gap in violent outcomes is significant and enduring. While individual differences in levels of criminogenic traits or exposure to criminogenic circumstances and contexts explain some of the gender gap, the most profound differences in process may be at the situational level, where research finds notable gender differences in aggressive responses to provocation. We argue that a more complete accounting of gender differences in aggression must assess variations in the way males and females process and respond to situational provocations and cues. We use factorial vignette data to examine gender differences in aggressive responses to provocation (someone flirting with one’s date at a party). We test for gender differences in emotional and behavioural responses to key situational characteristics that frame aggressive responses, including the characteristics and response cues of the provocateur as well as the size and response of the audience. We also assess the mediating and moderating roles of strain, anger, self-control and gender identity at the individual level. Findings suggest the centrality of gender differences in the processing and salience of situational cues to explaining gender differences in aggression.