Attachment-Oriented Gratitude Improves Parenting Behaviors and Well-Being

• In Event: 1-123 - Positive Well-Being in the Family System: Implications for Parent and Youth Development

Integrative Statement

Attachment theory suggests that an “enduring sense of joy” in caregiver-child interactions is vital to children’s immediate and long-term mental health (Bowlby, 1951), and parents often communicate their attachment preferences to their children via their emotions. Furthermore, attachment insecurity is associated with discomfort giving and receiving care, along with negative intrapersonal (e.g., negative emotion) and interpersonal (e.g., relationship disconnection, parenting behaviors) outcomes (Jones, Cassidy, & Shaver, 2015). Thus, understanding how attachment relates to parents’ emotions and well-being and developing methods to improve insecurely attached parents’ emotions are important scientific endeavors that may have downstream benefits for improving the parent-child relationship. The current studies address each of these research questions.

To better understand how attachment is related to parents’ experiences caring for their children, in our first study (N=270 parents; Mage=36.21; 65.3% women), we investigated the associations between attachment avoidance, compassionate caregiving goals, and parents’ behaviors and emotions in a 9-day daily diary study. Caregiving goals shape individuals motives and interpretations of their relationships with others, along with affective experiences in interpersonal interactions (Canevello & Crocker, 2015). Specifically, individuals with compassionate caregiving goals focus on supporting others in their interactions. In turn, these compassionate goals are related to more positive emotions. We hypothesized that attachment avoidance would be associated with less compassionate caregiving goals in parent-child interactions, which would result in downstream consequences for parenting behaviors and emotions. We found that attachment avoidance was associated with less compassionate caregiving goals, which in turn predicted parents’ perceptions of their child’s behaviors, as well as positive emotions, empathic emotions, psychological need satisfaction, daily satisfaction, and daily meaning in life (see Figure 1). This study suggests that targeting compassion may provide an opportunity to improve insecurely attached parents’ parenting behaviors and well-being.

Gratitude is linked with increased compassion, as well as greater overall positive emotions, greater prosocial behavior, and more positive social interactions (Algoe et al., 2016; Bartlett & DeSteno, 2006; Layous et al., 2017); however, few studies have considered the benefits of gratitude in parent-child relationships or for insecurely attached parents. In our second study, parents (N = 605 parents; Mage = 36.25; 70% women) were randomly assigned to one of three conditions: 1) to write a gratitude letter to someone who made them feel cherished, protected, or accepted (attachment-oriented gratitude), 2) to write a gratitude letter to someone who was kind to them (general gratitude), or 3) to write about their daily activities. Attachment-oriented gratitude led to the highest levels of compassion, relative to the other two conditions, t(609)=8.16, p<.001. In addition, only attachment-oriented gratitude led to improvements in feelings of connectedness among participants high in either attachment avoidance or anxiety (bs>0.13, ps<.03), which in turn predicted improved perceptions of child’s behavior, parental overcontrol, meaning in life, positive emotion, and negative emotion (ps<.01) five days later.

Together, these findings improve scientific understanding of the links between attachment insecurity and parents’ emotions and behaviors, as well as one simple, self-directed method by which insecurely attached parents may improve their emotions and behaviors.

Authors

• S. Katherine Nelson-Coffey, Sewanee: The University of the South
  Presenting Author

• Melissa Zankman, Sewanee: The University of the South
  Non-Presenting Author

• John K Coffey, Sewanee: The University of the South
  Non-Presenting Author

• Cayla O'Hair, Sewanee: The University of the South
  Non-Presenting Author