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This qualitative research with parents of gender diverse children examines how parents navigate the public school system with and for their child. In this paper, we explore how gender diverse young people are located in somewhat limiting discourses of safety, risk and bullying which deny the interrogation of cisnormative discourse in schools. In the current, conservative climate, where progressive strategies for inclusion have been derailed, schools seem to utilise what we describe as a ‘pedagogy of containment’ which subjects the gender diverse student and their family to the burden of negotiating gender identity, managing relationships and providing information and resources for inclusive education. School leaders and teachers require greater professional development as they have a professional obligation to educate all.